Baby loss is a heart-wrenching experience that affects thousands of families each year in the UK. In 2022 alone, there were 2,680 stillbirths in the UK, equating to approximately 8 babies stillborn every day. The ripple affect of these losses spread far and wide, and in addition to the parents, there are siblings, aunts, uncles, grandparents and friends, who also need support through their grief.
The loss of a baby can have profound emotional, psychological, and physical impacts on parents and families. Grief can be overwhelming, and many parents struggle to find ways to cope with their loss. The emotional toll can lead to depression, anxiety, and other mental health issues.
When friends, family members and even strangers see someone grieving, they often feel uncomfortable and treat grief as a problem to be fixed, which can lead to comments and opinions, which although well intentioned, can be painful to receive. A professional counsellor can hold a space for the bereaved, to explore their personal grief, to feel it, and to talk about it freely without judgement or comment. Counselling can therefore play a crucial role, for the bereaved to find their own path to move forward, one that feels right to them. Counselling can also help parents navigate the complex emotions that come with loss, offering strategies to find a way forward.
I have just completed an intensive course designed by the charity Sands for counsellors, focusing on developing skills to support parents who have experienced baby loss. This training has provided me with invaluable tools and insights to take into my practice, including hearing directly from bereaved parents’, who kindly shared their personal stories and experiences. It allowed me to hone a variety of grief management techniques and create practical strategies to help parents cope with their grief in healthy ways.
Through this course, I’ve learned that while we can't take away the pain of loss, we can walk alongside parents, offering support, understanding, and hope. Baby loss is a devastating experience, but with the right support, parents can find a way to honour and respect their grief, in order to find their own way to live with their loss. Counselling plays a vital role in providing the emotional support and coping strategies needed to navigate this difficult journey. It is important that no one has to go through this alone and that there is timely and appropriate support available when needed.
If you or someone you know is struggling with baby loss, reaching out for professional support can make a significant difference. Remember, you are not alone, and help is available.
Please email innerminds@btinternet.com or visit www.innermindscounselling.com for more information or to arrange a one to one session.
Lisa Holben MBACP
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